Finally, the serpent got me

I’ve never really understood the Apple/Windows or Apple/Android fanboy vitriol.

I mean, I’ve historically been a Windows guy because I’m geeky and in the early 90’s Apple machines were truly crap. Don’t get me wrong – Windows was fairly terrible too, but the abundance of cheap software and Linux for the proper jobs meant Apple never really got a look in. That doesn’t mean I don’t see the merit though. For the right dumb-user-and-don’t-care person it’s a great (if pricey and exploitative) option.

But when it comes to smartphones (or in fact anything), I abhor lock-in. Apple is a master of lock-in (iMessage being a great example), and they can go take a running jump as far as I’m concerned.

So, I’ve tried a myriad of Android and iPhones over the years, but – whilst the Apple hardware was just fine – they just made it too damn hard to use one without getting stuck in the quicksand, and I ended up throwing them at someone.

However, Android has pissed me off recently. Manufacturers seem to go out of their way to make a slick experience impossible: even on a new unlocked handset there’s an abundance of bloatware like Facebook or Samsung Cloud, Bixby, etc. bullshit; and the experience just isn’t as smooth and slick as it should be with a £600+ device. Blame shit apps, or the OS, or blame the data slurping telemetry workload, but the outcome is the same.

So, it was with some trepidation that I accepted a new iPhone XR as a work phone. But… (deep breath)… I have to say, Apple have finally swung me!

Through Signal, WhatsApp, Firefox, Google Photos, Outlook and OneDrive I have managed to avoid any kind of Apple lock-in. It’s annoying not be able to set Signal to be the default SMS app, but pure SMS is fairly rare these days; and it took a contacts sync app to replicate my contacts and still avoid lock-in – but hey ho!

It charges wirelessly, so I can re-use my existing chargers rather than have a snakes nest of crappy frayed Lightning cables.

I’ve deleted all the OOTB crap without complaint, and the few Apple apps I can’t remove are hidden away.

Above all though, the experience is as smooth and slick as it bloody well should be on a £750 device!

Would I spend my own money on one? No, probably not. A OP7 achieves much the same for less. But I don’t want to throw it at anybody, and that’s something.

So this is what’s wrong with the world

Fyre Festival was an egotistical clusterfuck. You should watch the Hulu or Netflix documentaries on the subject, if for no other reason than to chuckle at those blissful idiots who are so blinded by their consumerist FOMO that they can’t spot an obvious con.

It was predicated on the desperation of social media followers to be like their “influencer” idols – people who get paid vast sums to post fake content promoting stuff. People desperate for their tweet/snaps/instagrams to be followed or liked, as if it in someway matters. Think millenials Instagramming a pouting selfie with the asteroid and fireball behind them and you’re pretty much there.

So, once you’ve paid a social-media con-artist through the nose to go to a not-island, to stay nowhere and eat nothing and the realization that you’ve been conned might begin to dawn on you… what do you do?

You take a pointless selfie of course!


One ping only

Your message

   To: Lewis Griffin
   Subject: Group IT Director role
   Sent: Thursday, July 12, 2018 4:06:19 PM (UTC+00:00) Dublin, Edinburgh, Lisbon, London

 was deleted without being read on Monday, January 28, 2019 2:17:44 PM (UTC+00:00) Dublin, Edinburgh, Lisbon, London.

It’s alright Lewis. I’d already figured back in July you’re like most other recruiters; but a shout-out to Exchange for confirming it 🙂